Avoidance Tax

Something really strange happens whenever I get stressed out about anything that I'm obliged to do but don't want to. I shut down. Completely. I don't know when or where I started to develop this habit of avoidance, but it really has become a part of my personality. This is the way I'm feeling about work at the moment, I've been leaving the things that I don't want to do a bit behind, and they've piled up and I can't get any new work done because I haven't addressed the work thats outstanding and my mind just goes into this weird loop where nothing gets done and I just freeze! Whats up with that.

Plus, add to that the fact that a prospective job in internal audit (YES, INTERNAL FUCKING AUDIT) in Montreal has made me think that I have a viable alternative to my current situation, and you have one very confused fella here. I don't want to leave my life and friends here in London, but a part of me is thinking that I can't stay at my job either. I am sure it will all seem better on monday morning, it always does. But for now, I am tired and confused, and gagging to go out clubbing. Oh wait I have little money til the end of next week. I'm sure I'll manage ...