Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Oh Bugger!

I mentioned earlier how I'm really looking forward to my trip to Brussels on Friday, well now I'm getting a little apprehensive about the whole thing. This is because the guy I'm supposed to go meet has just emailed me with news that he now 'sort of' has a boyfriend, its very recent and he'll explain when I get there. He also says he's looking forward to seeing me.

I don't really know what this means exactly, but I do know that the weekend won't be the little romantic getaway that I was hoping for. I am glad for him, and I wasn't expecting either us to not go out and date as we never agreed on being in a relationship, so its fair enough I guess (its not like I've been sitting at home knitting since September when we met). I am just hoping that I don't come back to London all depressed and moaning about how much it sucks being single, which I will after seeing the person I'm supposed to meet with another guy.Its going to be so much effort having to put on a brave face and pretend like the whole thing isn't really bothering me on the inside. I am trying to be pragmatic about the situation, but I don't think its wrong of me wanting to be selfish from time to time. I could always just not go, but I've already had to cancel one trip I've already paid for this year because of unforseen circumstances, I won't do it again. Anyway, at least I'll get to eat some waffles and chocolates, so it won't be all bad.

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